What Will You Be Called: Auntie or Mrs.?

Auntie or Mrs.

I am sitting here on vacation in West Java. It will probably be one of the last vacations we take while we are here in Indonesia and that kind of makes me sad. But, I thought I would take some time to reflect while listening to crashing ocean waves and enjoying the tropical warmth.

We came here to West Java with some of our friends…they are a part of our house church and they are teachers at the school. They have three kids whom I am the principal to but they call me “Aunt Laura.” I love that this morning Emma, Stacey and I had “girl” time with Emma painting our nails. I loved yesterday that we did the over, under game with waves coming like I used to with my kids and other kids who I was Auntie in years past.

In 1990, when we first hit Indonesia, our then bosses, Pat and Steve Copple, posed us with the question, “Do you want to be called Aunt Laura and Uncle Nick or Mr. and Mrs. Armstrong?” At the time we were both pretty young and without kids of our own. I had 3 nephews and one niece and Nick had numerous nephews and nieces on his side back in the U.S. The whole Mr. and Mrs. Thing just sounded too formal for us so we went with Aunt Laura and Uncle Nick and looked forward to being called that by other families with whom we got to know.

Our own children over the years have called many adults “Auntie” and “Uncle” who although they were no relation to the kids, these adults were their Aunts and Uncles here in Indonesia. They knew the difference between their “real” Aunts and Uncles in the U.S. and those (all of them) have always been extra special to them. But, they have had many Aunts and Uncles here who have also had a special part in the formation of their character and who they have become today.

I do remember my kids sometimes being confused when we would be back in the States for a couple of months and they would meet our friend. Annaliese or Lukas would turn to Nick and I with a questioning look of, “Do we call these adults Aunt and Uncle too?” It has always been a respect thing as well for our kids. They know that it is respectful to add a title to the adult’s name and since they grew up doing that in Indonesia, they often forgot and did the same thing when in the U.S.

As I reflect on this concept, I am thankful that many years ago I decided to be called Aunt Laura. That is what the kids call me at school even now and it feels so much friendlier to my ears than Mrs. Armstrong, especially being in the principal position. There is something endearing to me to still have friend’s kids call me Aunt Laura and know that in some small way I can be an “auntie” to them and love on them in ways that their real Aunts would love on them if they were here.

Times are changing though…more and more are going by Miss, Mrs. or Mr. and then their first name. That is okay, change happens. I also know that being back in the states I will be Mrs. Armstrong once again. I will dearly miss being called Aunt Laura by students at MICS. 

Interesting People

Interesting People

All my life I have had the privilege of getting to meet interesting people. Growing up in a ski resort town we occasionally got to meet famous people or meet one of the old timers that had been around the valley for a long time and would share stories. Living overseas has also brought an opportunity to meet many interesting and out of the ordinary people. I definitely cannot include everyone so this is just a smattering of those I remember and wanted to include in this blog. I am thankful for each person that has crossed my path and feel very blessed by all the people I have met through the years….

One of the first of the “interesting” people that I remember meeting in our adventure over here was Catherine. At 70 years of age she came to Indonesia to be a missionary. Yep, you read that right, she was 70 when she first came. Having grown up living with her parents all her life, she never felt the freedom to leave to go anywhere until they passed away. She was from Alabama and was a true Southern Lady! I remember her serving Nick some sweet ice tea and telling him with a true southern accent, “Honey, if that is not sweet enough, just put your little pinky in it and stir. Then it will be sweet enough for you!” She ended up leaving Indonesia just before her pace maker warranty for her heart was up. But the dust didn’t settle long under her feet. She got a new pace maker, I believe, and then headed to Africa where she served until her death. She was a woman that definitely lived her life fully to the end and allowed God to be the director. (Sorry for those who know her story better-i may not have all the facts correct)

Pat is another one of those amazing women that stands out in my mind. She was Aunt Pat to some or Mrs. vanderMark to others. She was the 5^th grade teacher for many years at Mountainview and came to serve overseas after her children were raised and on their own. She had been an MK in the Sudan while she was growing up. Her stories always fascinated me about what life was like growing up overseas through WWII as well as other uprisings. She grew up, moved back to the U.S., married a Dutch man, had two wonderful boys but after her husband passed away, the itch to be overseas came again and we became the recipients of Aunt Pat’s serving at our school. Pat is one of those teachers whose students all come out of her classroom thinking they are her favorite. Annaliese and Lukas both were blessed to have her as their 5^th grade teacher and they learned a lot from her. I benefitted from Pat’s amazing encouragement of me and often cheerleader type spirit that kept me going even when it was hard to make decisions as the principal. I often remember Pat in the morning, prayer walking around the school. That always comforted me as a reminder that God was watching over us and would take care of us. Thinking of Pat always brings a smile to my face and reminds me to praise the Lord no matter the circumstances, because that is what she would do. She had hoped to serve at Mountainview as long as possible but unfortunately the government put a restriction on how old our teachers could be. But in typical Pat form, she too didn’t let the dust settle long under her feet and headed to another teaching position in Senegal, West Africa where she has taught the past 3 to 4 years. She is now back in the States but I am sure she is keeping busy and finding ways to serve Him however possible. 

I think I will end this “Interesting People” blog with a couple. Arny and Wanda Humble who have always held a special place in my heart. When we lived in Yogya., they were also living there. They had already be on the field for over 25 years, I think, having already served in Kalimantan for many, many years and then moving to Yogya. to teach and work at a University/Seminary there.  Wanda had been an MK in China and I remember one story of hers that during WWII she was separated from her family for a very long time because of the war. I can’t imagine enduring that as a child and then still choosing to come back overseas and raise her own family. I think I also had an affinity to Wanda because she had roots in my hometown and I thought that was pretty cool to meet someone who also had Idaho roots. Wanda and Arny were a couple that were full of patience and deep love for the people of Indonesia as well as anyone they came in contact with. They were wise and someone I always felt we could learn from. I am thankful for the influence they have had in our lives. Wanda went home to be with the Lord this past year and while I know Arny misses her dearly, he continues to seek ways to serve the Lord. I even heard he was here in Indonesia again for a visit.

There are so many others I could write about and I know I didn’t do justice to those I wrote about here. I am thankful for the interesting people has put in my life. My life is much richer for it!

Holding Loosely

I woke up yesterday and it seems that I am beginning to allow myself to feel something about moving in this coming year. There has been a part of me that was trying to keep a lid on my emotions and put off feeling about the upcoming transition. But, yesterday as I was making my coffee, I looked at the two jars that hold the coffee and the sugar. The jars are really not that special, just glass jars with blue lids and a latch on them. As I was going about making the coffee I realized that these jars will most likely not follow us to the U.S. and it made me sad. It really seems trivial to be thinking about jars but it made me look around the kitchen and realize how many of the things, familiar things, that I have been using for the past 15-20 years that will not be following us back to the States. That was a hard reality. Some of those tears that have been held behind the wall begin to trickle out.

Later that morning I got to skype with my very wise daughter! She knows about transition and moving back to the U.S. better than I do in a lot of ways. She had just returned from Urbana and was sharing some of the things that impressed her and that she learned. It was exciting to hear what is going on in her heart. I shared with her about the jars and she very wisely talked with me about the need for the familiar. It is not necessarily bad to need the familiar and going through transition it will be something that we may need. I guess it will come down to choosing wisely. I guess I get a bit hung up though between holding loosely onto things, because really they are just things, and the need for the familiarity. Annaliese shared about a friend who was walking with her at the end of their trip. They had to move hotels and were lugging their bags with them on a mile long walk to the new hotel. Her friend looked up at one point and said, “I guess I understand why Jesus tells us to leave everything behind to follow Him. Stuff is really heavy.” Again wise words. Stuff is heavy and it can drag us down. How much do we really need?

So in the midst of this transition I am praying for wisdom in how to balance leaving stuff behind because it is heavy and can drag me down but also sensing that I may need the familiar to help me through this huge transition we are being called to! Something I am sure I will be pondering in the months ahead! 

P.S. If you would like to see some pics from our latest vacation to Lombok area, here is the link: https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.10152394849300165.947534.711050164&type=1&l=acb6b56218